Nostalgia

I’ve been feeling quite nostalgic recently, where does the time go? 50 is looming large on the horizon, and I’m okay with that, but the last 20 years certainly seem to have passed so quickly. I’ve also been feeling so thankful for everything, it still feels pretty unreal to end up where I have. I don’t think I could ask for anything more, really. I’m so blessed to be living in such a beautiful place that is so … well, ME. Having Heidi here has worked out wonderfully, I love being able to share the property and have someone that loves it as much as I do. The property has been transformed in the year that she joined me here, her love of taking care of all the outside details is like living in a magical fairyland where plants and things just sort of APPEAR – and I can’t wait to see what it all looks like as everything grows and matures. It’s hard to imagine what life would have been like without Heidi here, she has really made it into such a homestead.

And the arena, wow, do I just love it! I love having it for my own dogs, and I absolutely love teaching out there. The open sides looking out onto the hills and orchards – oh, it just makes my heart sing. And even with the crazy stormy weather we’ve had, well, pretty much since I opened the place – no problem with the bad weather coming in. The surface has been great, and I love how everything ended up working so well with classes. Teaching there has been so easy as I really haven’t run into any big snags at all. I also thought it might be hard for students to come out – but haven’t lost anyone from the commute, even with the crazy gas prices (certainly wouldn’t blame them!). I love my students, I love my classes and how supportive they are of one another – and I love agility. It truly is the best dog sport out there, the teamwork, the communication, the training – but with no pressure, you want that happy, relaxed enthusiastic partner. I’ve been doing agility for LONG time, over 20 years now, and it has never gotten old to me.

Agility is different now for me than it used to be, I certainly don’t have any great ambitions (did I ever?). I love the training, but I definitely do less of it now. Sometimes I wish I was as ignorant and oblivious about things as I was when I started. I look back at the equipment and the things I asked my old dogs to do – Fenwick did the 6 foot 3 aframe when he started agility! Now, I think he did okay in the long run, but London is the dog that I wished I had done less with. Jumping 26 inches from a young age, the big aframes (complete with stopped contact!), the bad angles, the unforgiving metal jumps, the small weavepole spacing. I think that illospoas injury was definitely agility related, and it makes me sad that I did that. Now, I think London would have chosen to do agility still (god he loved it!) – but he never needed to jump that high, or practice and compete that much with that equipment on those courses.

Oh the memories with those dogs though, learning what kind of teamwork you can have with a dog – the adventures we shared together. I miss those dogs, we had such fun and they taught me so much. I love seeing those starting out in agility with that same wonder and excitement and drive to learn ALL the things. I’m so lucky I get to share that journey with people, I’m so lucky that I now have the security of having a facility of my own to ensure I will be able to continue to do it.

It’s been interesting now that I have the arena exploring exactly what I want to do with it. And especially as another instructor locally wants to bring in lots of presenters and have trials, I feel relief that it’s not something that I feel like I NEED to be doing. It’s not my thing, I love my little classes and my students, and I want them to have trials and presenters to go to – I just don’t have any great need to deal with the stress of it all. And the arena is my home, I am thankful I can provide a practice space for my students (always important in agility!), but for the most part, I like things being quiet and peaceful here when I’m not teaching. I don’t feel the need to fill the arena all week long, and I think Heidi agrees. We are actually having our first trial at the arena, a UKI trial … but I’ll be at a herding trial that day, so, ha! Hopefully it goes smoothly, but I’m not involved in the organizing, I just don’t have time right now.

I do think I need to actually TAKE my dogs to some seminars and workshops and work on ME though. For way too long I’ve been focused on the teaching aspect, and not on my own dogs. But you become a much better teacher when you’ve been a learner – and for many reasons, I have not been in a LONG time. And, good lord, COVID has made me into such a lazy handler! Which is good for my ability to teach distance, which my students definitely need, but let’s be fair, mostly I’m just being lazy.

Realistically though, I wonder if I’ll ever have dogs as highly trained as I did back in the day. I think my drive to train and compete to that level has faded, as well as my worry about repetition and dogs like Asher killing themselves by doing stupid things if pushed. I’ve definitely become a ‘good enough’ trainer, though I think I always have been. I love TRAINING behaviors, I love the process – but after that, I don’t really proof or maintain the behaviors like a good trainer should. But I still love agility, and I have so much fun with my dogs – it’s still like magic to me.

So, yeah, my schedule has been really heavy, the heaviest it ever has been including two days a week teaching from 9am-9pm – and with extra workshops and lots of private lessons peppered in as well. On the one hand, it actually has gone quite well – I haven’t felt overwhelmed or tired of it all. I really do love agility! On the other hand, it’s been 5 months of this, I need a break to recharge. I have three more weeks and then I’m taking a three weeks off before starting my ‘lighter’ summer load in August. I then return to normal classes in September. I’ve just be so thankful that it’s been such a cool spring/summer – I really hate the heat!

So, yeah, feeling grateful, so grateful, for my wonderful life, I feel like a ended up exactly where I wanted to be – and I look forward to what the future holds. I’m always grateful for my animals, the happiness they bring me just by looking at me makes me smile. I’m thankful for dogs that have taught me to enjoy every day – you never know what might happen, and they won’t be here forever. So make it special and enjoy all the little moments.

Life without Bryn is very quiet – man, are my boys such well behaved dogs. And apparently … Bryn is not. I think I have an unrealistic view of how well behaved my dogs are. They’re easy for ME, but put them with someone else and it quickly becomes apparent how many things I just let slide. To be fair, Bryn is behaving herself in the house at Bonnie’s, and getting along with the other dogs – and even eating! But apparently she’s been totally just ‘out for Bryn’ on sheep, and is currently at the stage of working in small pens with a long line, as she’s just doing whatever she wants. Now, I do think she actually is better for me, but on the other hand, a good indication of exactly how trained she is (not very!). So I hope she decides that Bonnie is worth listening to so she can actually learn new things, instead of finally doing things she SHOULD already know how to do. Ah, girls.

They have a couple more weeks left, and I think Bryn is finally settling down and deciding that listening is vaguely important. I hear Bonnie has cleaned up her flanks and is working on her walking in softly – even introduced inside flanks, something new! Been getting her on verbals too, which she just hadn’t had much exposure to. They have a couple more weeks, but it’s really good to see Bryn settling down and thinking, instead of just reacting. So thankful Bonnie took her on!

It’s also been good for Bryn to get out and about, as there are CHILDREN and MEN WITH BEARDS out there in Idaho – which apparently Bryn has not had much exposure to! So she actually let one of the small girls pet her recently, so feeling much less dramatic about children, which she’s had zero exposure to. Such a good experience for her at summer camp!

The boys are doing okay without Bryn here, but it’s VERY quiet – and lots of sleeping. Bryn is not only our girl, she’s our puppy – puppies keep things interesting! Without her I just have three well behaved and rather sedate dogs in the house. Asher keeps running out like a wildman … and then keeps waiting for Bryn to chase him. They will be happy to have her back, I’m sure – we all adore that little girl.

Before Bryn left we were actually having a lot of fun filling in our agility foundation holes with Justine’s flatwork program. So many holes! But she was actually enjoying all the fiddly bits now. Hopefully we can continue to catch up when she comes back – and I’ll have time then too.

Asher is continuing to work on his jumping homework, but once we moved to more collection based stuff it became apparent he just can’t. Which is nice to know, and we’ll still work on it, but he doesn’t have that kind of physical bendability.

Haku continues to get older, we’re trying him on some sort of new supplement that is supposed to pep them up, but I doubt it will do anything. We haven’t been hiking, and I think that would be good for him – but, yeah, busy and SO MUCH RAIN. Maybe this summer? Love that boy.

Asher and Navarre went off with Carol to try out AKC D Course – and Navarre tried out ducks! Navarre actually looks really good on ducks … so, naturally, after the first day he refused to look at them, he only wanted to sheep. Sigh. Still, at the trial he did actually deign to work them, though he made sure there weren’t any sheep hiding in the corners first. He is much softer on ducks, so hopefully he’ll still work them. I only entered him because I THOUGHT he’d enjoyed getting more herding time! He’s such a mystery sometimes. He’s been fired from B Course, as he just doesn’t know how to shed, and who is going to teach him? So he’ll do A course and ducks in the future.

As for D course, the boys did pretty well – Carol finished Navarre’s advanced title over the weekend, with a reserve high in trial and everything – good boy! Asher got excused for busting up sheep the first day, but pulled it together for day 2 and 3, and ended up high in trial on Sunday – good boy! Of course, he had a poo explosion in Carol’s car day one – poo EVERYWHERE. Poor Carol, that’s such a nightmare to clean up. I think the sudden heat and then excitement got to him.

Carol and the boys have a USBCHA arena trial coming up at the state fair in a couple weeks, which should be amusing. I don’t think they’ll win any money, but hopefully they won’t totally embarrass Carol. Then another AKC trial in August, which makes me happy they’re getting some sheep time, as we haven’t had time to practice lately.

Summer did finally arrive, though it’s still novel enough at this point that I’m not too upset about it. Everything is still beautiful and green from the ton of rain we got in the spring. Looking forward to working with the dogs in agility and herding this summer!